Hide your children: There is a new half-man, half-beast on the loose. And he’s carrying a bat.
In a nod to the great man-imal combinations dreamed of by mad scientists and ancient myths, the Washington National’s Class A Advanced Minor League affiliate Potomac Nationals have created the “Bryce Harper Gobblehead.” As the name implies, it’s a promotional bobblehead that features the head of Washington Nationals superstar slugger Bryce Harper (wearing a pilgrim hat and signature stubble) on the body of a turkey.
“Half turkey, half Nationals phenom, truly this beast is one of a kind,” says the narrator of a promotional video (see below) about the Gobblehead in a wonderfully bad fake English accent – a nod to National Geographic wildlife film narration, no doubt.
Anyway, the Gobblehead promotion aims to tap into a Thanksgiving theme, showing “thanks” to fans by presenting them the collectible at a May 13 home game – dubbed “Pfitzgiving Night.” The “Pfitz” is taken from the Pot-Nats G. Richard Pfitzner Stadium.
It seems the Gobblehead is just one of the zany bobblehead promotions the Potomac Nationals will be running this year. Others include the “Mighty Ducks Lester Averman Bobblehead,” “Stephen Strasburg Flamethrower Bobblehead” and “Anthony Rendon Real Electric Hair Bobblehead.” (I’m not a Nats fan, but the Averman bobblehead has me considering a trip south down I-95.)
While some have jokingly called the Gobblehead a “horrifying” creature that will “haunt you until the end of your days,” the terror stoked by the man-beast pales in comparison to the monster the Detroit Tigers unleashed upon fans a few years ago in the form of a Max Scherzer bobblehead. Those psycho killer eyes…we still see them in our nightmares.